Top five reasons why Facebook sucks.

Okay, now I'm sure everybody who will ever read this uses Facebook. That is unless you make up the small minority of trash that still uses Myspace. Myspace is like the McDonalds of networking sites. But that isn't to say that Facebook won't still ruin your life. Without any more ado, here it is:

P.S. Note to self. If you put the word "ado" without using the phrase "without further ado," people will have no idea what you are talking about.

5. People will be your friend.
Granted friends are great... for the most part. Virtual friends are even better: they don't come over and eat your food and you don't have to see them when you don't want to. But the problem comes when you are friends with someone on Facebook and kind of friends with them in real life. And when I mean kind of friends I mean people you may nod to or say hello to in the hallway. But now that they are your Facebook friends they think that means you are real friends. If that were true than Tom from MySpace would already be president. As it is, it just means that crazy girl from my English class now feels the need to discuss my favorite movies.
On another note, I sometimes act like that crazy girl– mixing up virtual relationships with real ones. She says she wishes she could make her life a limited profile for some people.

4. Bumper stickers
I fucking love bumper stickers. And that's the problem: people love them too. One day you get bored while studying for finals and then enxt thing you know you jsut sent somebody 50 bumper stickers. Its like Christmas for them. The problem is they now expect you to send them everyday. It's like a real relationship. And God forbid you send them to somebody else. In that way bumper stickers are a virus, like v.d. Although it doesn't burn as much...I hear.

3. Being friends with a club promoter
I happen to be friends with a club promoter who sends me literally 2 invitations a day to the Shy Lounge at Hofstra. And I'm sure people have similar problems. I mean its cool if you go to these clubs, but I don't even go to his college where this takes place. Granted I do want those five dollar tickets to see Soulja Boy and I know that if I mention your name they let me in for free, but I'd much rather spend two hours a day delting your fucking messages then ever go to your club. Still, I am friends with him because I love the attention.

2. Top friends
How many fights has this caused? Its like the prom bus seating all over again.

1. My mother is on Facebook
I set her to limited profile, but really... Actually my mother could also be my boss or my teacher or anybody of importance. Its not safe to be on Facebook while you have a job or go to school or ever want to do any of those things. The fact is people can see your profile and anything up there people can see. So there are two responsible things you can do: Change your name on Facebook by one letter or use your friends name.